I Don't Know How She Does It by Allison Pearson

"At times, I can almost be moved to tears by the picture of the thrifty responsible homemaker I could and would become. But the idea of not having an income after all these years makes me so fearful. I need my own money the way I need my own lungs.

And how would I be, left alone with the kids all day? The need of children is never-ending. You can pour all your love and patience into them, and when is it all right to say when? Never. You can never say when. And to serve so selflessly, you have to subdue something in yourself. I admire the women who can do it, but the mere thought makes me sick with panic. I could never admit this to anyone, but I think giving up work is like becoming a missing person. One of the domestic Disappeared."

So writes fictional character Kate Reddy, a working mother of two small children in England, struggling to find herself in the midst of her many roles of executive, mother, wife, woman.

When I started reading this book, I did so at the request of a friend of mine who asked me to read and review it. I got about half way through the book and I was so angry with the story I was almost crying. The portrayal of the stay-at-home mom seemed so degrading to me, and the life of the working mom so glamorous. (Of course, I, being a stay at home mom, read this with a bias to that end and took things personally whenever a stay-at-home mom was criticized by Kate or another character.)

However, as I continued to read, I began to realize the point of the story was not to demoralize the stay-at-home mom, nor to idolize the working mom, but to paint a picture of one woman's struggle to balance everything available to her. Kate honestly felt that if she let her job go, she would be letting herself go and she was terrified of that.

As the story progresses (in an amazingly well-written manner by first-time author Allison Pearson), Kate has some serious choices to make about what she really wants in life and the author does a great job of allowing the reader to feel the tension in those choices. As she processes through all of this she begins to believe the bigger picture should be of more than just herself. How she reaches the conclusions she does at the end will fascinate you...as well as break your heart.